Q.: My husband and I have been married for 10 years. Until two years ago, his 18-year-old son lived with us. He has since moved back in with his mom in another state.
When he lived with us, his dad got him a cell phone and he still uses it, with my husband paying for it. Last month he ran up the bill to $600. He works a couple of hours a week, and my husband says his son "can't afford the bill," so he's not making him pay it back. There have been other instances of my husband giving his son money for various things instead of telling him to either get more hours at his current job or get a new job.
We have a lot of arguments over this. Am I wrong and being too harsh on him? – Reader, via email
A.: How can anyone justify a $600 cell bill under any circumstances? Your husband is doing this boy no favors. Your husband is on a guilt trip because he is separated from his son, and he is exacerbating what might have been a bad situation by spoiling his son rotten.
If the boy is out of high school and is not going to pursue further education, he should be encouraged to get a real job. As long as the old man is there every time the kid holds out his hand, this boy is never going to grow up.