1. I am a fan of the Indianapolis Colts. I am a fan of the Chicago Bears. I am not a fan of the Denver Broncos. Nonetheless, I hope that Peyton Manning has a sensational year.
2. The Transportation Security Administration (the people who pat you down at airports) is fast becoming America's most hated agency, threatening to surpass the Internal Revenue Service.
3. Our national debt now exceeds $16 trillion. There are probably not 16 trillion grains of sand in the Sahara Desert. This is a disaster — a wreck about to happen. Our federal government is making a terrible economic blunder by continuing to borrow and covering it over by printing money.
4. It should be against the law to have political advertisements on television. (If campaign finance restrictions are legal, why not this one? Wouldn't it be a great relief?)
5. The best-selling novel, “Fifty Shades of Grey,” is what was once called “a bodice ripper.” As literature, it is total rubbish.
6. Crowded restaurants are often too noisy. Management should not aggravate the situation by blasting their customers with loud music.
7. In the recent past, Democrats have been the party that has benefited from vote fraud. (Of interest: A Democrat running for Congress in Maryland has withdrawn her candidacy after she allegedly voted in two states; and, in Marion, Ark., a Democrat state legislator, his father and two campaign workers, have pleaded guilty to conspiracy to commit election fraud. The agency known as ACORN, a supporter of Democrats, became notorious for filing fraudulent registrations.) This explains why Democrats are strongly opposed to voter I.D. laws.
8. One 15-year-old boy has twice as much common sense as two 15-year-old boys.
9. The re-election of Barack Obama is America's best hope for an economic recovery.
10. The Euro was never a good idea.
11. One small boy became famous when he said, “The Emperor has no clothes on.” Perhaps a modern boy will become famous when he says, “America is engaged in a religious war.”
12. You should avoid any movie or television program if the title includes the words “Vampire Teenager” or “Teenage Alien.”
13. The Democrats should not try to hamper members of the armed services in their efforts to vote. Instead, they should ask themselves why it is that so many men and women in our military are Republicans.
14. The current protracted policy of low interest rates is causing severe distress to most of America's senior citizens who are trying to live on their retirement savings. Why are interest rates being kept so low? See “National Debt,” the third opinion above
15. Christianity does not have any political affiliation
16. If another hurricane strikes America before the election, Barack Obama will claim that it is George Bush's fault.
Scoring: Count your points for each opinion as above indicated, EXCEPT for No. 9 (“The re-election of Barack Obama is America's best hope for an economic recovery.”) For that one, you get 4 points if you disagreed, 1 point if you agreed. Any score of more than 54 points marks you as “An Extremely Astute Person.” Between 44 and 54 points indicates that you are “A Somewhat Astute Person,” suitable to be received in normal society. If you scored less than 44 points, do not despair because at some time in the future there may be another opinion quiz, and you can try again.