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Driving with Dipsticks column: Keep your butt in your own lane

Monday, March 10, 2014 - 8:04 am

Last week after writing my column I headed to Chicago to watch a jazz concert with my daughter Jenny. On the way over I had not one, but two separate incidents where dipsticks dashed across U.S. 30 to pull in behind a car that was already waiting in the center divide. This precariously left them exposed as the rear of their cars was blocking the fast lane. Traffic was traveling at over 65 miles per hour at the time. I thought, well aren't they special! I merged into the slow lane just to avoid hitting one of them! I laid on the horn as I passed by just to express my angst. I thought, I hope I don't see that again.

Well, you seldom get what you ask for. On the way back from Chicago I saw a semi doing the same thing. Only this moron left his 53-foot trailer behind him and blocking two lanes of traffic! He had a dozen cars stopped behind his roadblock, and they were all honking at him, along with flashing their lights. Arms were waiving the one-figured salute, too!

Speaking of Chicago, Bill, a former resident of Illinois, wrote in and echoed some of the comments of last week. Bill proposed that people should be more cognizant of the walking lanes when out shopping. He noticed that people seldom walk in the proper areas and are darting in and out between cars, which is dangerous.

He said, “When you are in a busy parking lot, say Meijer, most people do not give a damn where or how they get into the stores. They never or rarely ever utilize the cross-hatched walkway entrances to the stores. Then to make it even better, you either get talked at, given the finger or have them slow down purposely till they clear your car!”

Speaking of driving around stores, How many of us have come up to an intersection while exiting a mall and trying to turn right had a big jacked-up SUV that has all of its windows tinted pull up on our left. Then as we nudge our car forward to get a look if it is clear to make our turn, the behemoth pulls forward to block our view! What is up with these Idiots? They have an unobstructed view to the left and can see for miles! They are behind a red light and can not go yet.

However these obliviots still pull forward to block your view and make it impossible to leave! The only thing they are good for is a roadblock when the light turns green!

As always be careful out there. No one else is!

Ben Brickman is production manager for Fort Wayne Newspapers. Want to vent? Send it to Include all the details you can think of. If your dipstick gets in the paper he'll give you the credit, or not. It's your call. You can phone in your Dipstick sightings at1- 260-461-8285. He's also on Facebook, Driving With Dipsticks!